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Astor is just a phony cartoon character

 

!!WARNING: THIS IS AN EXTREMELY USELESS POST YOU DON'T NEED TO READ IT. TO SMART, SOPHISTICATED PEOPLE WHO DON'T WASTE THEIR TIME, NOT READING THIS IS CRUCIAL TO SURVIVAL AND MENTAL HEALTH. IF YOU DO CHOSE TO READ THIS, BE PREPARED AND STEEL YOURSELF FOR THE STUPIDNESS AHEAD. -Legend of Chibi's Catalyst of Calamity!!


When I say Astor is a cartoon, I mean it. Astor's just that goth dude who sips Pitch Black Mountain Dew in the entrance of the girl's locker room even though he's a sick little man. Just looking at his phone Photoshoping pictures of his 7 cats......... ANYWAY.

!!HYRULE WARRIORS: AGE OF CALAMITY SPOILER WARNING GDBFHDHYYDFYREFDDGF!!!!!!

OKAY. So. After you've defeated Calamity Stupid in Age of Calamity, go to the Gallery* and scroll down to the "movie" labeled "Threads of Fate"** and click shwabam™ A button. THEN watch Astor go all emo on them as Zelda and the Champions recoil in disgust. 

Anyway my dad and I discovered that when he says "All you despicable pests!" My dad claims he sounds like Daffy Duck. 

Absolutely NO idea why I made such a long post about something so stupid, but.......

Also I will be posting more jokes because everyone love jo jokes.

Also, if you don't like humor why're you on this blog?


*The gallery is accessed by pressing - on the map screen (not the one that you can use during challenges and quests, but the home one were you pick side quests and ect) and scroll


**Threads of Fate is the name of a Cutscene/movie near the end of the story in Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity in which our heroes confront the evil seer, Astor, once more and confirm that the black Guardian scarily similar to Terrako, the good time-traveling one is Calamity Ganon reformed. See more details on the internet on IGN, Wiki Fandom, Polygon ect.

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